I just want a phone. Is that too much to ask?

Subtitle: How to disable Google Now Cards (that keep annoying you) when you swipe left (right? up? argh, fuck this shit!) I own an Android phone. In an effort to get rid of a feature that came with updates I’ve been going through dozens and dozens of settings. Unsuccessful, at wit’s end, writing angry loner … Continue reading I just want a phone. Is that too much to ask?